two way street
by wooden cards
Summary: "There's no conspiracy behind the way two hearts meet - when love is a two way street."
1. Chapter 1

_I feel the four become five  
and I'm waiting, waiting, waiting  
for you to walk down the boulevard  
and to take me, take me, take me_

The first time, she had been standing at the other side of a road across him. Red on the traffic light was flashing brightly while cars zoomed past him. It was raining rather heavily, raindrops falling in tandem and soaking him with every minute. If it weren't for the Shinsengumi coat, he would've been chilled to the bone. The grey skies tempted him to return to home to the Headquarters for a nap, only that he couldn't.

His eyes were much too transfixed on the petite girl standing opposite. Her purple umbrella shielded her from the unyielding rain; her lucent eyes staring right back at him.

Unlike the monochromatic people that blended right in the dull background, she was much too bright. Instead of fading into the grey blurs like the other people, her pale skin and vermilion hair stood out. Not to mention, there was her eyes. How was he to describe them? A blue so brilliantly bright it stood out the most. As he watched those eyes, he felt unknown emotions encased behind them. He didn't understand why her features went unnoticed by the people standing beside her.

Just like that, the two stared, giving nothing away in their gaze. When the red changed to a walking figure of a green man, the crowd stirred and started to cross the road. Their masses broke his eye contact with the girl and he stood back. Rubbing his eyes, he blinked a few times and looked up again. The people cleared, giving him a view of the spot where the girl had been standing.

She was gone.

* * *

AN: Inspired by Kimbra's "Two way street", I decided to indulge in a short story regarding our favourite pair - Kagura and Sougo. This is somewhat AU, a time where the two have never met and Sougo is coping with the loss of his sister. I'm working on the other pairings for my poll one-shot, promise!


	2. Chapter 2

_but the moment you appear  
you wake me, wake me, wake me  
out of the slumbers of my head  
from the slums of loneliness_

After the death of Mitsuba, Sougo found himself reminiscing about her on sleepless nights. He sees her smile again, as he dreams of her warmth when she held him close. Her, re-assuring him, that the deafening thunder and fulgurant light wouldn't hurt the young him, for she wouldn't let them do so. He, who was afraid of everything at that tender age. He could vividly remember the way she'd walk to him the moment he came home from a day of training, and wipe off his sweat with the sleeve of her yukata. Even if he told her that it would make her clothes dirty, she'd simply give him another one of her smiles.

He truly loved his sister more than anything in the world. He admired the fact that she only smiled when she meant it and how she would never utter a word about the problems she shouldered. He loathed and loved that part of her - because he knew that she cared about him and refused to have anyone she loved worrying about her. No matter how demanding he was, she put up with him without a single complaint. Even with her own selfish tendencies, like any other child at the age of eleven, when it came to the six-year-old him she pushed her own interests far behind.

Mitsuba cared about others more than herself, and Sougo could only hope to emulate that part of her. He was selfish, he admitted, and it made him cringe when he had to do something for people he didn't care about. If someone asked him, "why are you such a prick?", he'd say that he was born like that. Selfish pricks didn't become generous overnight. That was the way he was, and no matter how much he wanted to be selfless like his sister, the thought of him being so was beyond himself.

Yet, one meeting with that girl changed everything. A fleeting second of her left him dreaming of those blue eyes that night, a first since Mitsuba's periodic visits. Instead of waking up to the throbbing pain in his chest and hot tears running down his face, he woke up feeling lost. It was an immature thing to do, but he felt a sort of blind rage at the girl. She had cruelly taken away what he held precious to him, and he wasn't going to let her go.

A few times, he tried to run towards the girl in his dreams. He wanted to shake her and throw something at her, ask her why she decided to appear, and tell her to disappear. Yet every time he tried to move in those dreams, he would only stay rooted to the same spot, cornered by her unwavering gaze.

Trying to find the girl, he proceeded to ask around. It was a surprise to the other Shinsengumi members when he approached them. It was the first time in a long while that their captain talked on his own accord. Though they did find his description of the girl odd, they were glad he started to talk again. The members even asked around, but there was no such girl. Every time he asked someone, they'd look at him like he was a lunatic and shake their heads.

"Sougo, maybe it was just your eyes playing tricks on you." Hijikata said one morning, as he leaned on the frame of the door. He was looking up at the clear, cloudless skies while the first division captain sat on the floor, staring off into space.

Languidly, he looked up and the vice-commander turned his head to look at the boy. It was then when Hijikata noticed the exhaustion in his eyes.

"It wasn't."

Hijikata said nothing, and took a long drag of his cigarette before exhaling. His eyes followed the skeins of smoke that were slowly drifting towards the skies, gradually dissipating.

* * *

The tall marble stones aligned in a row reflected the glaring rays of the sun. The cicadas ensued their monotonous screeching in the background, and like how everything fell into place perfectly he found himself standing in front of her gravestone.

Okita Sougo was twenty now, and stronger. Throughout the years that Mitsuba left, he found himself taking relief in the way blood spewed from the bodies of his opponents. It pleased him to claim the last breath of his enemies. It filled the gap temporarily and diverted his attention; his sadness; his anger from the losing her.

Yet, his evolved strength seemed to die away as he stood in front of her grave. Even if two years had passed since she left, he felt like his nine-year-old self again – the one who hid under blankets, away from thunder, away from everything. It was something that he thought he had long grown out of. The carefully constructed barrier served him well during all the times he was at a fragile state, disallowing anyone to witness him at his weakest moments. The only person who had the privilege to witness him in his bare form was Mitsuba, and he chuckled. Even after her death, she continued to see him in the state that he never allowed anyone else to glimpse.

It was his first time visiting her again. Already, he could imagine her all too-kind smile at him, and her saying gingerly, "Thank you for seeing me, Sou-chan."

Undeniably, he felt like a coward for his refusal to acknowledge the name engraved in grey. Years had passed and he still felt like he was seeing his sister in the eyes of his young self. Now that he thought back, how did he think he was ready to see her again when he shrugged on his jacket that morning?

Kneeling down to be eye-level with the grave stone, it took him a moment to realize that it was his hands and not the baby pink asters that were shaking. Slowly, he placed the asters in the small, porcelain vase resting on the steps and smiled. Asters had always been Mitsuba's favourite.

"Ane-ue, I'm sorry I took so long to see you. I'm really happy that I got to see you after such a long time." He said in a well-mannered tone, like he always did with her.

The cicadas continued to screech, this time slightly louder, as if in response to him.

With his palms resting on his thighs, Okita continued to stare at the ground. He hadn't looked at the engraved name on the stone properly. Not yet. No matter how much he willed himself to face it, he couldn't seem to move at all. It felt different from the last time, when he forced his broken arm to move after fighting off hordes of ruffians. It had worked at that time, propelled by his want to survive. This time, he couldn't feel his joints at all.

"I… I want to see you again."

It took Okita a moment to register the reason why his eyes were suddenly clouded. Holding a hand up, he covered his eyes and felt the accumulating dampness of tears against his palms. Unable to hold it in, the captain finally let out a gasp and started to cry.

The sounds of him choking on his sobs disrupted the steady tune of the cicadas. His shoulders felt so heavy, like some invisible weight being placed on him, crushing him. His kneecaps burned from the pavement underneath him, and his thighs cried out in pain from kneeling, but he ignored all physical pain. The only thing that he could focus on was the long-stashed away grief and longing that had been abruptly set free, greedily consuming him whole.

"I'm sorry, Ane-ue, I am really happy to see you again, that's all."

If there was anything that he had in common with his sister aside from their appearances, it was the fact that they were both terrible liars.

* * *

He had spent hours talking to his sister. His clear voice echoed about the silent cemetery as he filled her in about his life. He spoke to her gently, telling her about how Hijikata almost got killed by someone who had accidentally threw numerous grenades in his room once, how she should have been there to see it when he wet his pants and oh, how time seemed to fly when they talked.

Getting ready to go, he got up and dusted his pants. He had been only person in the cemetery park for the whole day, now that he thought about it. The heat was now replaced by the casual breeze that accompanied the setting sun, spilling its last rays of light for the day as an indication that it was time to go. Giving a last look at the stone, he gave another smile.

"I'll see you again, Ane-ue."

He turned his head, and he saw her.

She was standing at the end of the pathway of gravestones, her head inclined to the side, studying the names on the stones with clear blue eyes under heavy lashes.

During the years where he hadn't seen her, she had certainly grown. Her hair was now in two, long pigtails compared to the two buns she had up when he last saw her and she still donned Chinese clothing – except this time, the clothing was form-fitting. In a hand, she held her closed parasol and when she turned to look at him, her cerulean eyes were unmistakable.

* * *

AN: Wowee this draft has been rotting in my folder, so being the impatient person I am, I decided to put it up for the sake of updating two way street. I owe a huge thanks to my beta reader for two way street, **sixillusion**_, _who willingly beta'd and put together my messy stuffs. She's great, and if you're a fan of horror/adventure/mind-blowing and wonderfully written fics you can check out her work. It's brilliant. Anyway, bless my beta-reader. This is half of my chapter two but I think I'm not updating 'two way street' anytime soon after this... ah might as well. _  
_


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